Week off prior to Toledo.

Wednesday: HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY! No offense to my British readers. It was great to have a little time off after our usual marathon performance at The Open. Haven't slept this well for awhile.

Seeing so much familiar blacktop as we traverse the country, I like to change it up when I have the chance. When  I reached the Southern tip of Ohio, taking the scenic route to Toledo was the obvious choice. Some guys hightailed it to Cleveland for the chance of a loop in the Nationwide event (heard the parking lot was full of unemployed caderos) but that was not for me. Parked my butt at the Knights Inn just off Airport Hwy. and will be here for the next two weeks. It's not upscale by any means but does come with some perks. The best of all is Don Pablo's Restaurant just a few yards from our door. This will be "caddie row" during tournament week.

 

Don Pablo's, a "happy hour" that's just stumbling distance away.

 

  • Keep it simple ... My last evening in Pine Needles was spent sharing a rental house with a few compadres. It was a combination invite of camaraderie and necessity by saving me a nights rent down the road and hoping I can fix Motion's laptop. He had not been able to access the Net with the high speed Ethernet for the last two days and two hours on the phone with Dell was of no avail. Since it had been working and nothing new was installed, it had to be something of a simplistic nature. Dell wanted him to reformat the drive (they always do that to start from a known configuration) but I thought is was a bit premature. After arriving, I headed for the ailing hardware, took a quick look, confirmed the lack of access even though the signal was strong and a sense of familiarity came upon me. I had seen this before. Now pay attention, cause the following course of action may help you one day. Walk over to the router (the box your cable is plugged into), unplug the power source and plug it back in. The router reboots and renews the IP address it assigned to your computer. VOILA! Motion was back in action and I was thanked by a round of thunderous applause and a few beers.

  • Speaking of laptops: Are you in a quandary on which to choose when it comes to your next purchase. Should I buy a Mac or a PC? Both have their own advantages and disadvantages but I found this little video that may help make up your mind. Check out Mac or PC.

  • I'll be in the lot: Looking for work this week will be my first priority as former tour player, Mardi Lunn, will be looping for Dina.

Friday: Stopped in to have my brakes checked and noticed a brochure about changing the cabin air filter. The what? Many new autos filter the air entering the passenger area and mine happened to be one of them. A quick check found a filthy mess and had it replaced in quick order. A noticeable difference was not expected but I was wrong. On the highest setting, the fan noise diminished and seemed to run much smoother. Then I remembered an incident with a room air conditioner that was extremely clamorous. I opened it up and discovered the nastiest filter imaginable. After cleaning it up, the unimpeded air-flow had it down to a whisper. You may wish to check your vehicle and see if you have one also.

  • I know you: While sitting in the waiting area with my Browns shirt on, I struck up a conversation with another customer who was a Bengals devotee. We touched on once-famous athletes who squandered their wealth and former Bengal Ickey Woods (inventor of the celebratory dance "The Ickey Shuffle") came up. Years ago, my new acquaintance found Ickey on his threshold selling Omaha Steaks door-to-door. You never know what's just around the corner.

  • Great news! Dina just found out she made it into the British and I'll be on the bag.

Sunday: Made a quick trip back home to visit relatives and of course, took the scenic route once more. Drove through the minute berg of Woodmont OH on Rt. 20  and passed an establishment with a most unusual name. The "Speed Trap Dairy and Restaurant " sat at the edge of town and seconds later, I discovered why that title was chosen. Two hundred yards down the road the local constable had an auto pulled over and I'm sure this wasn't an infrequent occurrence. Wonder if that eating establishment has a discount if you present your citation?

  • It's a miracle! Maybe. I have a few things stored at my brother's place and thought a little house cleaning was in order. One item was was my deceased Compaq laptop for which I was given my current IMB as a warranty replacement. It had been sent back four times before it was supplanted out of frustration (would restore OK but freeze up when installing more programs) and I assumed would remain a doorstop for evermore. But wait, I've been reading about the Linux replacement for Windows called Ubuntu and figured I'd give it a go. So far, it installed without a hitch but needs plenty of more testing to make sure. I just may have brought it back from the dead and, if everything works out,  I'll name it Lazarus. If you feel adventurous and have an old computer lying about, you may wish try this yourself.

Monday: Struck-out looking for work. A few guys snagged a bag but I didn't stick around too long.

  • Prodigal son: If only for one or two weeks, Kenny Harms has returned to his old stomping grounds. Former husband of Emilee Klein, and current looper for Hale Irwin, will be toting the sack for Teresa Lu. Hale is taking a three week hiatus so Kenny decided to punish himself. You never know, he may be the "silver bullet" T-Lu has been looking for.

  • New kid on the block: Allison Akin has been hired on and joins our esteemed group of rule officials. Allison has been with the AJGA for three years and held the assistant women’s golf coach position at Louisiana State and Troy University. Her attributes also include extensive nationwide rules officiating, operations and volunteer organization/training and experience as a Tournament Director.

  • We'll leave the light on for you, NOT! Natalie's looper received a bit of disconcerting news regarding his British Open lodging. Seems the room he reserved at the B&B he found won't be ready for another six months. Oh, did I forget to mention the fire?

  • Part time job: That's what it must seem like for "Donna Wanna", Jennifer Rosales' cadero. As I was told today, she has looped a total of just 39 holes tournament holes in the past ten events.

Tuesday: Looks like I was "the last man standing". Everyone either found work or gave up and headed for greener pastures. I did have an offer but, after careful consideration, turned it down. The heat took its toll on one of the player's fathers and he decided to take the week off. The job was mine but I would have been quite the hypocrite if I took it. I think you can figures this one out.

  • Someone can't count so, we're out! The glorious news about making The British was dashed by an updated eligibility list. 10-12 players were notified they were in but whoever made the tally (from The British HQ), did it in error. Dina is now third alternate. One player who was included in that group plopped down $1500 for a plane ticket before being notified of the mistake. Think she's a little miffed? This unfortunate lot does have one last chance to get in before the week is over. The top five after the first two rounds, who have entered but not yet in, qualify.

  • What's in a name? Plenty. Young-A Yang is now Jacqueline Yang and from what I understand, don't call her Jackie.

  • Make-over: John Gulbis (Natalie's dad) is sporting a cleaner look this week. Hair shortened to collar length and trimmed beard had everyone noting his adjusted appearance. Keeping in the spirit of gentle ribbing, he claimed Natalie did it while he slept. 

  • Skippy it was not: Before leaving Rochester for The Open, Catherine Hull realized she forgot to put her "special" peanut butter into the checked luggage and the new rules forbade it in a carry-on. She queried Carl "The Caddie Machine" if it would be OK to put it it in his and he acquiesced but, when checking in, his adjusted valise tipped the scales at 55 lbs and he was charged an additional $50 fee. He new from the previous flight it was only 48 lbs but was too exhausted to argue. After arriving in Pinehurst and settling into his condo, the unpacking procedure discover seven jars of the exceptional spread. Must be some tasty stuff to lug that around.

Wednesday: Persistence paid off (with help from "The Nerd") as I snagged a Hooters girl (that's the bag she carries) for the tournament. Riko Higashio pulled out due to a bad shoulder and Jenny Gleason took her place. We practiced a bit and I checked a few things on the course. Tee off is 8 AM on number one.

  • 1,5,11,14,34: That combo earned one lucky looper $67,125 in the California Fantasy Five drawing last week! Just before heading for Toledo, the ticket was checked and hands started to shake. Figures the take will be around fifty big ones after taxes. Name withheld due to obvious reasons. There maybe  a bill collector or two out there waiting to pounce.

  • Player down but not out: Nancy Lopez succumbed to the heat yesterday afternoon just before she was to play in a six hole celebrity pro-am but a turnaround in the temperature helped her recovery and she played on schedule in today's pro-am.

  • Bloviating barristers: The snafu regarding The British Open is now in the lap of the finest legal minds (I'm being kind) both organizations can afford. I'll keep you posted when a decision is made.

  • Caddie down: Bob Kendall has been put on the DL indefinitely due to a water skiing accident. He injured his hamstring and the prognosis is uncertain. His wife Denise will be toting the bag for Jimin Kang in his stead.

  • New toy on the way: I have to admit, gadgets pique my interest and by tomorrow, I should be in the possession of another. Will keep you apprised of the details as I give it a full evaluation.

  • Speaking of: Looks as if I won't be naming my old laptop Lazarus after all. The Ubuntu froze and an "Error 17" message keeps popping up no matter what operating system I lode. Looks like it's off to the recycle bin.

  • What's in a nickname? Plenty. How about "Concussion" as a moniker? That's the name Jenny coined for a fellow competitor and it's spot on. Don't even ask me to say who.

Thursday: Do believe in the paranormal? I always thought there was more than meets the eye to our existence and today went one more step in confirmation to that opinion. As you know, we took the place of Riko Higashio in the field and, if you have been following her progress over the season, realize she has performed dismally. This was probably due to her ailing shoulder and not a reflection on the golfing ability. Well, today it looked as if Jenny inherited (by some type of mystic transference) Riko's game and carded a nine over round of eighty. I deduced this phenomenon after noticing every non-electronic scoreboard (there's one on each hole) still displayed "Higashio" instead of Gleason. At first we thought it was a bit comical but, after mulling it over, truly believe we "took the express to "Rikoville" and wound  up paying the full fare.

  • Something for your medicine chest: I'm sure the extreme heat and humidity early in the week took a toll on the delicate undersides of a few caderos (AKA caddie butt) with all that chafing going on but I just was informed of a tried and true remedy folks in the South swear by. Boudreaux's Butt Paste is synonymous with that particular ailment like black-eyed peas is to collard greens. A tube available in strategically placed port-o-lets would be a welcome addition during "the dog days of Summer".

Friday: A late night exorcism almost banished the "spirit of Higashio" but there must have been some residual bad juju. A triple and double (both on par fives) ruined what could have been a great comeback. Shot +1 even after giving up all those shots.

  • This could be a first: Jenny thought she would rattle Kuehne's cage a little on the first tee. She pulled out an orange Hooters ball indicating the intent to play with it and expected a retort in the manner of  "Might as well. The white one didn't work for ya yesterday." But she disappointed us both, falling for the ruse, and was lost for words. 

  • Not for me: Kuehne received one of those much sought after iPhones as a gift but it won't be replacing the BlackBerry she currently employs. She claims the surfing feature is great but as a work tool, it falls a bit short of the mark.

Saturday: A free lunch was on tap at the course and I took full advantage. Didn't linger long though, you'd rather not be there when not working the weekend.

  • Here's mud in your eye: Not quite mud but when one veteran looper mistook the ear drops for his eye drops, he probably wish it was. The horrific sting of a product that consists of mostly alcohol will get your attention in a hurry. Luckily, it happened early in the week and he's almost fully recovered.

  • Caddie down but not out: Every once in awhile you just have to give your puppies a rest (we do put in a lot of miles) and "Super Fan" Dave managed to get a shot of some slacker taking advantage of his player's benignity

 

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What I do best.

 

Sunday: Even though steak was on the free lunch menu, I passed. The next few weeks are uncertain as I don't have work for the match play or Evian event. The British is still up in the air but prospects are dim. May hang here for another week. We'll see how I feel tomorrow. Some of the boys departed for Springfield MO hoping to grab a bag on the Nationwide Tour but that was not in the cards for me.

 

Week off (Match Play) after Toledo.

Monday: A minor reshuffle of loopers took place going into the upcoming string of big tournaments. Meghan Francella, Karin Sjodin and Giulia Sergas all made a change.

Tuesday: Just hanging out at the Knights Inn. Seems like I've been here a month.

  • Alternative selection: Since I've gone to a web hosting service and rarely use my dialup connection, cancellation of my Integrate account will be forthcoming. I found a pay-as-you-go ISP which may be used in a pinch and sounds promising. Budget Dialup offers 10 hours for $5.95 and unused minutes roll over to the next month. It starts off with a 5 hour free trial.

  • Slim and trim: Proud of yourself for dropping a few pounds? Well, how about over 400! You have to check these incredible photos.

  • News from the front (Match Play): 

    • More changes: Young Kim's looper was MIA (he never showed) and Hawaiian Zac, waiting it out for his flight to Evian, took his place. Also, taking it in the shorts for the umpteen time, "The Admiral" showed up yesterday expecting to work for Hye Jung Choi but was replaced by her manager.

Wednesday: Dina is taking the plunge and going over to qualify for the British and I'll be toting the bag around The New Course. We're both flying out on Friday the 27th. Dina from Phoenix and myself out of Detroit. Still need to arrange transportation and hopefully able to get into New Hall (my abode for the week) early.

  • The next Major? Lisa Fernandes pulled away in The Michigan Open and finished with a three shot cushion. Check out all the scores here.

  • No one left in the lot: All those "Nationwide hopefuls" got work. Next week may be a different story as it's a big one.

    • More news: Young Kim's absent cadero finally showed. He was waiting for his passport to arrive before leaving for New York. Still don't know who will be on the bag this week but he's supposedly working for her at Evian and the British.

Thursday:  If you haven't heard by now, a third event has been added to the Hawaiian swing and the LPGA has officially taken over the Futures Tour. I'm sure these were finalized some time ago but a major market like New York City was the likely place for an announcement.

  • Burning question: During the Jamie Farr, an open forum was held by the players and the main topic seemed to be the upcoming drug tests. So much time was consumed by this subject it led one player to remark "We spent an hour learning how to pee in a cup" which had me comeback with "From how far?".

Friday: I managed to book more motels for down the road but the British is starting to be a hassle. See below.

  • Further clarity: As pointed out to me by a former cadero, that third Hawaiian event will be in October and not in conjunction with the other two. Looks like this stop will be on the way to Asia making that trip a bit shorter time wise.

  • Front update: "The Admiral" is still on the bag for Choi, just not this week. He will be going to Evian and the British.

  • Looks like they're setting up: Check out the webcam at St. Andrews. The bleachers are going up behind the eighteenth.

  • In name only? That's been the knock of the British for some time, compared to the way our other Majors are run, and it seems this year is no exception. Trying to get from Edinburgh or Glasgow airports involves a combination of train, bus or taxi and an inquiry revealed that transportation provided by the tournament is available for players only. Caddies are required to fend for themselves. If I remember correctly, we even have to provide our own towels. On top of that, we're getting hammered on the exchange rate.

Saturday: BOOOOORING! Is that your estimation of The Open at Carnoustie? It is mine. I was hoping for a spell of torrential rains that were forecast but I would have settled for a 40 mph gale. There is always tomorrow.

  • Gadget update: The Garmin Nuvi 350 GPS was my test subject and even though I was quite impressed and amused by its capabilities, back it went within the allotted return policy window. The clincher was an online post I spotted today revealing that the units coming out this August will be loaded with the 2007 maps. Still may pick one up at the end of the year.

  • Something in common? What do McDonald's French fries and roaches have in common? According to this video, they both may endure a nuclear holocaust. A survival test of a variety of McDonald's fare revealed astonishing results. Even after ten weeks cooped up in a jar, no mold appeared on the deep fried spuds. You have to check it out.

  • I wonder? If you bought an iPhone and gave it a spin in the nearest daiquiri making device, what would be the result?  No need, it's already been done. That and a whole host of other objects have been put through the ringer (so to speak) and can be found on willitblend.com. I especially liked the light sticks.

  • The end's in sight: Looks as if this may be the finale of the match play event in the US. May be moved to Thailand was the word.

Sunday: I can see why the demise of match play-and to some extent, even more- may be upon us. It's easy for the top players to be eliminated and wind up with  dullards (no offense) fighting it out. Keep in mind, the less charismatic personalities do not draw an audience and to a sponsor, it becomes harder to justify the expense.

  • Who can you trust? As the rain pummeled The Open, you couldn't tell by the forecast from AccuWeather.com. This was displayed as the "current conditions" for Carnoustie as posted online at 7AM Eastern.

Partly Sunny

 

  • Just checking in: The 18th at St. Andrews from the webcam.

 

Headin' for the barn.

 

  • Van de Veld curse? Is that the toughest finishing hole ever? Happy to see it went down to the wire.